Series 5, Episode 7
Awkward Silence Count: IIIIIIIIIIIIIII
So Andy and Louise are official, but Louise is still pretty bitter over Lucy and Spencer. Anyone else pretty sure where this storyline is going?
Lucy immediately runs to Spencer to tell him all the gossip about Andy and Louise. Apparently Spencer doesn’t give a shit, which is strange because last week he had a little shout to Andy about how he definitely did give a shit. Changing the subject, he tells Lucy that he wants to keep their relationship ‘casual’. ‘You’re like on the same page right?’ Haha, Lucy doesn’t look happy.
Ollie and Cheska have a weird sex conversation while hula hooping/looking like their having a fit. Three or four times a day Cheska?! Really? No wonder she’s so good at hula hooping …
Spencer invites Lucy and Binky to another extremely quiet bar … with Jamie. Oh so awkward. But Binky knows how to handle the situation and breaks the silence by inviting them all to a barn dance. Then Jamie storms off because he just can’t handle Lucy’s face.
Ollie and Ashley are STILL together, but this time I think they really do break up in a very emotional, tea-filled discussion.
Phoebe asks Jamie to ‘hang out’, which is Chelsea code for a date. They’re teenager-ly flirty which is kind of disturbing.
Lucy tells Spencer that she’s not getting with anyone else, and ask Spencer if he is. He tries to avoid the question but then admits he’s being a bit of a whore, which she doesn’t take too well. They break up. If you can count it as a break up because they weren’t really together in the first place.
More clues on Proudlock’s job. He now has a gallery with photos and arty stuff, which doesn’t seem to relate to the previous clues we’ve had. And his mother is a terrifying cougar that looks like she’s going to eat Spencer up.
Phoebe and Jamie have blown off Proudlock’s exhibition and are on some sort of date … at a pig farm. She’s telling him that she likes her relationship with Proudlock being ‘casual’. Wow, her and Spencer should get together.
Lucy runs off to Binky’s mummy for some advice about Spencer. She can’t tell why everyone likes Spencer, and she’s got a point. Personally I can’t see it either. Binky’s mum thinks it’s because he has a massive dick which makes Binky gag …
Louise eats with her mouth open, and continues to take things REALLY FAST with Andy, and tells him she wants to tour around Europe with him. Woooh Louise, you’ve been together for like two weeks. Then Stevie calls him and Louise continues to be the most annoying girlfriend ever, continually asking him what he’s saying.
Yay, it’s the compulsory-end-of-episode-party and this week it’s Binky’s barn dance. However, despite the fact there’s a guy shouting out instructions, all they seem to do is jump up and down.
Lucy and Spencer have broken up and Lucy and Louise manage to make even that into an argument about how Louise is a pushover. Proudlock tells Phoebe that he doesn’t want to continue their ‘relationship’, which, let’s be honest, wasn’t really a relationship to start with. Then rounding off the episode with some moderate drama, Spencer tells Louise once again that he has ‘no hard feelings’, but Louise tells him just being with him makes her upset and storms off and sits in her car on her own while everyone else has lots of fun. Good on you Louise.
So Ollie and Ashley broke up, Spencer and Lucy broke up, Proudlock and Phoebe broke up, and if I was dating Louise, we would have broken up too.